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The Lord’s Next Chapter For Us

The Lord’s Next Chapter For Us

The Lord tells us, clearly, that in this world, “you will have trouble”. He tells us to “count the cost” and warns us that following Him means carrying our cross and denying ourselves and suffering. Scripture makes it clear that this world is “in bondage to decay”, that sin and pain and death are part […]

Laugh and Live? or Cry and Die?

Laugh and Live? or Cry and Die?

Have you ever gotten to the place where you wish you could just check out of this life, just be done with it all – and go on home to Jesus? Yeah, I’ve felt that a lot, since Dominic. And apparently, I’m not alone: “For we know that if the earthly tent we live in […]

On Being a Terrible Waiter. Or Hoper?

On Being a Terrible Waiter. Or Hoper?

I am a terrible waiter. Not waiter as in food server (although I’d stink at that too), but waiter as in not getting what you want right now. Waiting seems to imply inactivity, and, yeah, I fall just a bit more on the “make it happen for yourself” side of the line. On the Fruit […]

Do You Want to Get Well?

Do You Want to Get Well?

Pity Party It has been a week of abundant stress and limited resources. In so many areas, the “not working out” has outweighed the “going the way I want it”, “not enough” has seemed to outweigh the abundance, and disappointment has outweighed hope. It’s been the kind of week that makes me soul weary and […]

Moving, Losing, and Hope

Moving, Losing, and Hope

I don’t have a lot of really close friends. Oh yes, I’m an extrovert and I’m good in a crowd and can kibitz with the best of them at a gathering, but, ultimately, my really-good-friend circle is pretty small. My friend life is much more “an inch wide and a mile deep” than “a mile […]

To Dominic on Your Birthday: The Measure of a Year

To Dominic on Your Birthday: The Measure of a Year

How do we measure a year? In birthdays. This one – your first – what does it measure? The ways we have loved you, without you, and how we have known pain unimagined, heartbreak, the stone cold hard reality of death at our door. Dreams ripped apart, theology torn Fists to the sky, fallen souls […]

Weary

Weary

I love my Lord. And I trust Him completely, and truly believe that He is always working for my good. But sometimes I’m just weary of it all. I’m a fighter. But these past few weeks even I have wanted to just surrender. Life is so much harder than anyone tells you, when you start […]

Dominic’s Diaper Genie

Dominic’s Diaper Genie

We are selling our baby stuff. I have kept the diapers that people gave me for Dominic in his closet. Until now. Thinking that we would imminently have more children and I would need them. It’s been a year. For a variety of very important reasons, the Lord has made it clear that we are […]

The Hard Assignment

The Hard Assignment

Divine Subterfuge I had no idea, when Dominic died, just what kind of assignment The Lord was signing me up for. And if I had known, I would’ve just said a big ol’ “NO.” Yep, a la Jonah. Thankfully He didn’t really make it clear what assignment He had for me until I was already […]

Windows in the NICU

Windows in the NICU

Before, Dominic, I’d never been to the Neo-natal Intensive Care unit (NICU) in my life. After Dominic, I never wanted to go to the NICU again in my life. God had a different plan. Doesn’t He always? I continue to be left breathless in amazement from the ways the Lord has shown Himself to me […]

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